[gazmungus]

I thought this bit of the forum has been getting a little dusty lately, so I'll dump this thread here - it'll probably need to end up here anyways..

Remember my miserable banana necked old classical? Y'know, the one with the reclaimed aluminium window frame for a fingerboard that sounded like the easter bunny with polio when trying to play soft bossas?

Well I felt like being a bit of a copy cat, so I robbed out Emre's solution and toddled off down to the local glazier and demanded that he cut me out a replacement board. With the strings removed, the neck returned to perfectly straight! Fancy that!

It was worth violently tearing off the old aluminium board just to see the look on the glazier's face when I told him what the piece of glass was for - I'd originally told the geeza that it was for my enormously long lines of charlie, that gradually get fatter, hence the taper - he wasn't convinced.

Still, I left there with a 6mm thick chunk of glass and a tube of epoxy, so this evening I took the old girl down, ripped out her electronics (historectomy?), patched up all the holes and stuck down the slab of glass using the whole tube(s) of epoxy...

That was worth a laugh, after about 2 hours, I'd managed to get that damn glue in my hair, my pants, my eyes, up my nose, all over the washing up (not done from the weekend), on the couch and on the floor, so me and the cat have walked/smeared it all over the house. Thank god I didn't need a wee! Turns out that it don't taste too bad, though.....

The end result should have been a scrumptious, rich, shiney rosewood grain viewed through the glass, but instead it's more of a fart in a lava lamp type effect due to the air bubbles - I've decided that I don't really care anymore.....

So now I've got to wait about 3 days for it to dry before I can attack it with the tapewounds - that means 3 days of trying not to fiddle around with it!

why do I do this to myself? -

Because I'm an idiot.


_
gary

bollocks rules OK!

[transient]

Good to see you again around the bollocks forum

Well, from my experience, they never look as intended. Mine is filled with pencil-shavings under the glass and i have not painted over it, you can see pencil-lead bits there

What did you do to prevent the neck from bending? My strategy was to keep the neck bent and glue the glass flat over it (gluing was done with the strings installed and tuned to pitch).

.
e

[jahloon]

Speaking of stuff that gets everywhere... back in the 70's I was playing bass with this glam rock band... you may larf but everyone was in a glam rock band then, essential totty magnet strategy.

Well as you can guess some fair amount of time was spent getting stage theatrical make up (shop stuff's no good) from said suppliers. It was then that I found they sold 2 pound (about 1 kilo) bags of silver glitter. So I bought me one and sailed home on a cloud of ecstatic expectation.

That night at the gig it was heaven, we had glitter everywhere, a 2 pound bag goes a very long way.. throw handfuls into the air, get it in you hair, food, beer, clothes, everywhere. It was such a laugh, but then there is a slight downside...

Arriving home I had to bring forward my fortnightly shower to try and get rid of the stuff. No such luck, it lingered for weeks. I had it in my bed, heavens did it itch, it appeared in my hair every day like magic metal dandruff, but the worst and most surprising place of all, actually under my foreskin!!?? ***TOO MUCH DETAIL ALERT!*** How did it get there? Heaven only knows.

I'm not sure what the moral of the story is but I was glad I didn't have to go to the pox clinic that week.

--j

[Villager]

Now I know what Gary Glitter was all about. V

[jahloon]

Villager, on Apr 12 2005, 06:56 AM, said:

Now I know what Gary Glitter was all about. V

No, that was ryhming slang. --j

[gazmungus]

.....And back to bollux

We need an ugliest guitar contest - pencil shavings I cannot beat though! Brilliant!

Emre..... the neck will be 'considered' (hoped/prayed) straight because of the 2mm thick aluminium (bendy!) versus 6mm thick safety glass and half a tube of epoxy, I can't bend the glass by hand too well! Luvverly!

Jeff, 'Magic Metal Dandruff' - band name!

Your glitter parties make our 80s escapades with hairspray, women's undergarments and lycra seem relatively tame..

so I bet you still find the odd flake?

I still can't find the cat this evening, maybe he's glued himself to something he shouldn't....

_
gary

fortnightly bath nite tonight

[jahloon]

An ugliest guitarist contest might be something I'd be in the running for.

Magic Metal Dandruff is a great name for a band, pity I'm not playing metal.

Those fortnightly baths do keep coming round, I've got the bi-annual scrape pencilled in for next week and I can tell you I'm not looking forward to it.

J

[transient]

Gary, the epoxy must have dried, how does the guitar play? (and pics?)

.
e

[gazmungus]

transient, on Apr 16 2005, 08:18 PM, said:

Gary, the epoxy must have dried, how does the guitar play? (and pics?)

.
e

Nah, the epoxy hasn't hardened yet! I keep adding to it to smooth off the edges, It should be fully dry tuesday - I'm gonna need it for thursday nite...

For some reason, my camera won't let me take pictures of it, I think the auto focus gets confused by the glass....


but.....

off with the old...



and I've just realised that I'd not posted up any pictures of the finished orange thing - that's now retired, and it nearly got smashed. It looks like it'll spend the rest of it's existance as a wall ornament.. after the fiasco with my track..

Aluminium doesn't work too well for fretboards.



when I've had my bath time I'll try to work up some better pics

but unfortunately I've got a few cans of guiness and boddies in the ole fridge - so expect some wibbly wobbly results


_
gary

best of luck with the bi-anal scraping Jeff :ph34r:

[transient]

The orange guitar looks good, maybe you could glassify that one too?

.
e

[jahloon]

corcoran, on Apr 17 2005, 09:49 AM, said:

best of luck with the bi-anal scraping Jeff :ph34r:

Owww - that stung!

My gardening service hasn't shown up this year so I'm off out to mow the lawn, no Guiness for me this afternoon, though there are some Kronenberg 1664 in the fridge.

BTW "Kronenberg" - now descriptive of a certain kind of woman, looks 16 from the back and 64 from the front.

J

(c'mon you didn't expect political correctness in a fourm entitled "Complete Bollocks" did you?)

[jahloon]

Gazza, on Apr 17 2005, 11:19 AM, said:

If it looks 16 from the back then all well and good..

don't have to mow the lawn, It's raining! (there just might be a god after all)

I think the line you are looking for is:

If it looks 16 from the back then don't turn it over.

(We did warn you)

As for the gardening service, I did the sensible thing: Rang 'em up and played merry hell about the place looking like 42 Shit Street, they are coming tomorrow.

Cheers!

J